an atrocious recollection

Last Sunday at church we were talking about the nature of God when someone made reference to Jonathan Edwards' sermon "Sinners in the hands of an angry God". In contrast to our belief, that God is our loving Father in Heaven, some believe that our God is angry, with fiery indignation for sinful man. In Edwards' own words:

The God that holds you over the pit of hell, much as one holds a spider, or some loathsome insect, over the fire, abhors you, and is dreadfully provoked; his wrath towards you burns like fire; he looks upon you as worthy of nothing else, but to be cast into the fire; he is of purer eyes than to bear to have you in his sight; you are ten thousand times so abominable in his eyes as the most hateful venomous serpent is in ours.

The gal in church who brought this up made reference to the thinking (in other circles) that we are as evil spiders which the Lord holds over the fire ready to drop at any moment. I agree with Edwards' thinking in one respect: Spiders are evil.
I hate spiders. There's no way around it. I hate them.
Perhaps this began as a child when we moved to the country. They lurked at every turn in our old barn, they would spin their wide webs in the field, and horror of all horrors, made their way into the house on occasion. Being much afflicted with the loathsome creatures, I learned to keep a lookout for them.
Yet, alas, I was not to emerge unscathed by these awful vermin.
One morning I dreamed I was eating shredded wheat. Just as I swallowed a mouthful I was suddenly awakened from my sleep with the realization that I really was chewing something. I shot out of bed to the mirror. I opened my mouth, and there, to my utter horror, were long, twitching spider legs sticking out of my braces. SPIDER LEGS! IN MY MOUTH! AAAAAAUGH!
I never recovered from that harrowing experience.

Happy National Popcorn Day!

In honor of National Popcorn Day, (which, coincidentally just happens to be today), I give you a recipe for "The Tastiest Carmel Popcorn ever!"

2 c. brown sugar

1 cube margarine

1/2 c. Karo syrup (or corn syrup)

Boil for 1 minute, pour over 3-4 batches microwave buttered popcorn.

Warning: Due to the unhealthy nature of this recipe, perhaps it is best to enjoy only on National Popcorn Day.

A culinary misadventure

We bought an 8 pound jug of Orville Redenbacher's 'gourmet popping corn' a couple of weeks ago. As soon as we got home, I zipped to the kitchen and pulled out our heaviest pan and started popping. I had previously read that you can throw some sugar in (just before the kernels pop) and make kettle corn. So I got my sugar ready and voila! I had kettle corn! It turned out perfectly.
Now, I don't know how this happened, but somehow after this initial success my perfect popcorn popping skills took a turn for the worse. I burned every batch after! This was a problem. I suddenly found myself addicted to kettle corn and unable to duplicate my previous successful popcorn experience. Undaunted, (due to my newly acquired ravenous appetite for popcorn) I kept popping. I would just pick out the burned ones and call it good.
Then I had a great idea: MAPLE-CORN! Yummy!
Ooh, I couldn't wait. I even had 100% pure organic maple syrup! Ooh, yummy.
Now, what possessed me to think that I could suddenly produce perfect maple-corn after burning batch after batch of kettle corn, I don't know.
I took out our heavy pan perhaps a bit too optimistically. I heated up the oil and put in the kernels. I thought I'd just wait until the first one popped to add the maple syrup. That way, it wouldn't have time to burn to the pan. I even heated up the syrup so it wouldn't stunt the popping process.
I waited until I heard the first "POP!"
I whipped the lid off and was instantly pelted when 3 or 4 kernels exploded right at me. I was ready, though. I poured the syrup in as fast as I could and put the lid on fast, shaking the pan vigorously and
"KaSHZZZZZZ!" That unmistakable burning sound followed by that heart sinking burny smell. :-(
The stove was only on a low medium! I waited for the last moment to pour in the syrup! I even used gourmet popping corn! WAH!
I took off the lid. Every kernel was burned, half of them hadn't even popped. Lousy maple-corn. Lousy pan. Lousy popcorn!
What a let down! I grudgingly dumped out the scorched snack. I grabbed a spatula to scrape out the rest of the charcoaled confection, when there, on the bottom of the pot was the perfect image on John the Baptist burned right into the pan!
"MATT! Look! Look at this! Who does this look like? John the Baptist, right?!"
Matt agreed.
I could tell it was him because only his head had appeared.
I thought of that grilled cheese sandwhich with 'Jesus and the Virgin Mary' burned into it that some casino bought for some unreasonable amount.
"We could sell this on e-bay! We could be rich! Ha ha ha ha!"
Then Matt, and my conscience, reminded me that this would be taking advantage of those searching for spiritual enlightenment of sorts in the form of images 'miraculously' burned in cookery. John didn't actually appear to me in the pan. It would be like peddling vain idols. My mom tried to sway us by saying, "Hey, you could consider that fine art! Let the consumers decide! Don't deprive them of the chance to own such a culinary masterpiece!"
Matt heard this and washed the pan.

So I got down our 'Stir Crazy' popcorn popper, which pops plain popcorn perfectly every time, and enjoyed some perfect, unsweetened popcorn.

In observance of National Popcorn Day, (which, coincidentally just happens to be today- this was added January 19th), I am sharing my scorched pan picture featuring John the Baptist. I didn't realize it until just now, but it also looks like, to the right, John Lennon has appeared in my pan as well!

And, finally for your popcorn making bliss:
A note for those wishing to make kettle corn:

I did some research. If you put oil in your heavy pot, along with 3-4 kernels, you can turn off the heat once those kernels pop. Count off 30 seconds, and put in the rest of the popcorn and turn the heat back on. (Some swear this makes the perfect corn every time.) Then, just before you think they'll pop, throw in a teaspoon or two of sugar and shake. A few may still burn, but you'll get your kettle corn!

To each his own

I knew there was something to be wary of when I saw the writing on the present:

"For Mommy. Just what you wanted, especially the top one."

I could tell that there were cds under that happy Christmas paper. Matt confided that two were for me, and two were for him. Then he laughed mischievously.

I had a flashback to when I was a teenager and had brought home Bette Midler's greatest hits cd. ("Experience the Divine") I was blasting "wind beneath my wings" when my mother came storming in with a somewhat shocked and very disgusted look on her face.

"WHAT is THIS? Bette Midler!?! I thought I had raised you better than this! I can't believe you have brought such vileness into our home! You should be ashamed!"

I sat looking at that package under the tree. Its gold paper glistening under the Christmas lights, innocently.

Christmas morning arrived with all of its festivities. We had read from Luke 2 the night before and sung carols. The spirit of Christmas was bright and cheery. The gold present gleamed in the corner.

"Here Kathryn, open this one!"

Matt slid the gold gift my way.

I picked it up and smiled. Matt laughed ominously again.

"No, open it from the other side! I want you to see the top one first!"

I ripped it casually for effect. There, smiling up at me from the top was.... Neil Diamond.

"Neil Diamond? NEIL DIAMOND? Is this a joke? Is there really something else inside?"

Now I know somewhat how Mom must have felt all those years ago.

Later in the week Matt was playing his new favorite cd on the way to Gram's. We greeted her and sat down to dinner, and ever so quietly I heard Amelia singing, "Shilo when I was young..."

Stages

Amelia is in the "Why?" stage of life.

She has actually been at this stage for some time, but recently it has increased to mammoth proportions.

"Why we don't touch hot things?"
"Why we don't want boo boos?"
"Why you are moving that hot thing?"
"Why are you covering your ears?"

She also recently learned the word "realize."

"Mom, I walked in here, and I turned around, and I realized that there was a chair here! I didn't know it! The blue chair! Mom, why the blue chair here?"

I have realized why moms say "just because." It all started somewhere with a toddler and a poor exasperated mother. And it soon extended into teenagerhood where "I'm the Mom!" is added on.

Asking why is a critical part of how children learn, yes, I know.

Still, at the end of a long day, I figure that "just because" is a better answer than, "AAAUGH!"

Temple Square

Happy New Year!

“It is proper during this season when we commemorate His birth that we remember the Lord Jesus Christ in reverence and with love. He has done for us what we could not do for ourselves. He has brought meaning to our mortal existence. He has given us the gift of eternal life.”
-Gordon B. Hinckley

Dear Family and Friends,

Greetings! We hope this finds you happy and well. What a wonderful time of year it is!

Ellie was born on April 27 this year, and what a blessed little joy she is! I’m telling you, this gal was born happy. She has brought such happiness to our lives. Today she was jumping around in her little door jumper, smiling and laughing proudly. Cutie. Her bright smile makes me so happy. I catch a glimpse of heaven when I look at her. She only just recently relocated from there!

Some time ago I walked into the living room, and Amelia had tucked her little dolls in ‘bed’ on the floor with Ellie’s play mat. I looked around, and there were little beds all over the room. She does this on a regular basis now. She also says the funniest things. Nowadays, if she gets an owwie, she’ll come in and say in her cute little voice something like, “Mom! The floor said, ‘come over here and slip! Get a booboo!” or, “The chair said, ‘come get a bonk!’ and I said, ‘no!’, and the chair said, ‘heh, heh, heh!’” You should hear her ‘mischievous’ voice. She’s a riot.
We haven’t had to go to the ER in over a year, and what a welcome change that is! She has clinically outgrown her peanut allergy, but we haven’t dared give her nuts yet. Her allergist also believes she’ll soon outgrow her dairy allergy, and she’s now able to eat fish. We had salmon for dinner. Mmm. We were told there’s only about a 20% chance per allergy that she’ll outgrow them. All of her allergen levels have gone down, and some have disappeared, so we feel extraordinarily blessed. Now we avoid all dairy and egg, but maybe someday she’ll get to have chocolate chip cookies!

Ellie appears to have some food allergies, or at least sensitivities. We won’t know for sure until she is tested when she’s a little bit older. We know what to look out for now, so I feel much more prepared.

It was Matt’s turn for a near death experience this year. He had gone into the VA for a GI scope. This is a routine, non-invasive procedure. I’ll sum up the ensuing suffering by saying that 5 days later he was at work and had to tell his boss, “I think I need to go to the ER.” By the time he got there (again, VA) he was almost in need of a blood transfusion. They had clipped him during the GI scope and he had nearly bled to death. He lost quite a bit of weight and was in the hospital for 3 days. He is NEVER going back to the VA! After recovering from this harrowing incident, Matt has decided to go to grad school! He took the GRE and will be applying for a mechanical engineering master’s program.

I have tried to keep busy this year. Recently I’ve taken up the ukulele and can be heard plucking stirring renditions of “Happy Birthday to You.” I just got some Hawaiian ukulele music books from the early 1900s with high ambitions of one day being able to pay the hukilau song. Our family also has taken up rockhounding! So far this year we have found a glamorous array of geodes, agates, apache tears and topaz! Not to mention radioactive fluorite from the West Desert (we decided to let the U of U geology department keep that lucky find).

So that is how we are! We are so grateful to know each of you. Our lives are enriched and blessed by each family member and friend, and we feel so very thankful to have you. May your Christmas be a memorable one, and this coming year full of happiness and achieved goals.

Most sincerely,
Kathryn, Matt, Amelia and Ellie


Amelia's first written words: "To Dad"

Water Storage: Suggestions for How to Store Water Safely

Water is the most important thing to have in an emergency. (Okay, okay, it depends on the emergency. You can, however, only last so long without clean water to drink.) So, here are my suggestions for how to store it. I have sited sources used.

How to Store Water

Pre-Storage Treatments:
No additional household bleach is needed when water comes directly from a good pre-treated municipal water supply.

Add 8 drops (1/2 tsp.) household bleach (5.25% sodium hypochlorite) per gallon of water if the water is clear and not chlorinated. *See Disinfection below.

Add 16 drops (1 tsp.) of bleach per gallon if water is cloudy.

Water Storage Containers:
Plastic juice or soda bottles (made of PETE plastic) are the best. They should be thoroughly cleaned and rinsed prior to use. Don’t use milk jugs, as they degrade.
Food Grade heavy plastic buckets or drums. (NEVER use containers that have held chemicals, bleach, or other non-food items.)

Protect water storage containers from light and heat. Algae can grow if water is exposed to light. Store in areas where leakage will not cause damage to the home. Rotate water every 6 months.

Emergency Outdoor Water Sources:
*rainwater *ponds and lakes *natural springs *streams and rivers
Note: NEVER use flood water. Avoid water with floating material, an odor or dark color. Only use saltwater if you first distill it.
Filter out organic material and silt first by using a clean cloth or coffee filter and funnel.

Pre-Use Treatments
If the water isn’t pure, use a combination of methods below:

Filtration: There are many good water filters on the market. Get one with activated carbon elements which help remove some chemical elements. Look for a filter system that has a pre-filter before the micro-filter. Micro-filter should be removable or field cleanable. Some models also add chemicals to kill bacteria. Do your homework.

Disinfection: You can use household bleach to kill microorganisms. Use only regular household liquid bleach that contains 5.25% sodium hypochlorite. Don’t use scented bleaches, color safe bleaches or bleaches with added cleaners.

Method: Add 16 drops of bleach per gallon of water, stir and let stand 30 mn. If water doesn’t have a slight bleach odor, repeat the dosage and let stand another 15 mn.

*The only agent used to treat water should be liquid bleach. Other chemicals such as iodine or water treatment products sold in camping stores that don’t contain 5.25% sodium hypochlorite as the only active ingredient aren’t recommended and shouldn’t be used.

Boiling: Boil water for 3-5 minutes plus 1 additional minute for every 1,000 feet in elevation.

Distilling: While the aforementioned methods kill most microbes, distillation will remove microbes, heavy metals, salt and most other chemicals. Distillation involves boiling water and then collecting the vapor that condenses back to water.
To distill, fill a pot halfway with water. Tie a cup to the handle on the pot’s lid so that the cup will hang right side up when the lid is upside down (make sure the cup isn’t hanging into the water) and boil for 20 mn. The water that drips from the lid into the cup is distilled. You may also buy distillation equipment, but it is expensive. Also, distillation is a slow process.

*Water can go flat with storage and after boiling. Aerate it by pouring the water back and forth between two containers.

*Hide that bleachy taste with a powdered drink mix.

*Do you know the location of your incoming water valve? You’ll need to shut it off in an emergency to stop contaminated water from entering your home in the event of broken water or sewage lines.

*To use the water in your pipes, let air into the plumbing by turning on the faucet at the highest level in your house. A small amount of water will trickle out. Then obtain water from the lowest faucet in the house.

*To use the water in your hot water tank, be sure the electricity or gas is off, and open the drain at the bottom of the tank. Start the water flowing by turning off the water intake valve and turning on a hot water faucet. Don’t turn on the gas or electricity when the tank is empty.

*If supplies run low, never ration water. Drink the amount you need today, and try to find more for tomorrow. You can minimize the amount of water you need by reducing activity and staying cool.

Sources: FEMA, providentliving.org, Red Cross

“Preparing for Disaster.” Developed by the American Red Cross and the Department of Homeland Security, Federal Emergency Management Agency.

http://www.providentliving.org/content/display/0,11666,2246-1-1125-1,00.html

Get your free FEMA disaster preparedness book, “Are You Ready?” 1-800-480-2520

Checklist / How to make a 72 hour emergency preparedness kit

I think that it's essential to have a 72 hour kit. So, I have compiled the following helper to get you on your way. These are only my suggestions, based on research I have done as sited.
During an emergency, you may be evacuated and only have minutes to gather what you need. If you have a kit, you're good to go!

1- Water
* one gallon of water per person per day for at least three days, for drinking and sanitation
* Household chlorine bleach and medicine dropper – When diluted nine parts water to one part bleach, bleach can be used as a disinfectant. Or in an emergency, you can use it to treat water by using 16 drops of regular household liquid bleach per gallon of water. Do not use scented, color safe or bleaches with added cleaners.

Additional items you may consider adding:
* Water purifier
* Bandanna / coffee filter to filter out large sediment
* Drink mix to add to purified water to improve taste

2- Food
* At least a three-day supply of non-perishable food
* Can opener for food (if kit contains canned food. Note, 'poptop' cans may pop open in kit!)
* Ways to prepare food such as solar oven, barbecue and charcoal, wood, Sterno, etc.)
* Infant formula
* Pet food and extra water for your pet (where applicable)
* Mess kits, paper cups, plates and plastic utensils, paper towels
* Matches in a waterproof container (matches can be made waterproof by dipping in wax)

3- Clothing / comfort items[1]
* Complete change of clothing including a long sleeved shirt, long pants and sturdy shoes.
* Underwear
* Warm socks
* Rain gear: umbrella, waterproof coat/poncho
* coat, hat, gloves, thermal underwear
* Sunglasses
* Work gloves
* Books, games, puzzles or other activities for children
* Pictures of the family

4- Hygiene / Sanitation
* Dust mask, to help filter contaminated air
* Moist towelettes, garbage bags and plastic ties for personal sanitation
* Household bleach for disinfecting contaminated areas
* Rags to clean with
* Rubber gloves for cleaning
* diapers (where applicable)
* Hand sanitizer
* Soap
* Toiletries such as deodorant, toothpaste, toothbrush, floss, fingernail clippers, feminine hygiene products, comb
* Toilet paper

5- First Aid Kits
Things you should have:
* Two pairs of Latex, or other sterile gloves (if you are allergic to Latex).
* Sterile dressings to stop bleeding.
* Cleansing agent/soap and antibiotic towelettes to disinfect.
* Antibiotic ointment to prevent infection.
* Burn ointment to prevent infection.
* Adhesive bandages in a variety of sizes.
* Eye wash solution to flush the eyes or as general decontaminant.
* Thermometer
* Prescription medications you take every day such as insulin, heart medicine and asthma inhalers. You should periodically rotate medicines to account for expiration dates.
* Prescribed medical supplies such as glucose and blood pressure monitoring equipment and supplies.

Things it may be good to have:
* Scissors
* Tweezers
* Tube of petroleum jelly or other lubricant
* A handy first aid book

Non-prescription drugs:
* Aspirin or non-aspirin pain reliever
* Anti-diarrhea medication
* Antacid (for upset stomach)
* Laxative

6- Important Documents / Money / etc.[2]
* Important family documents such as copies of insurance policies, wedding certificates, identification, medical insurance and Medicare cards, family records, medical records, wills, deeds, social security number, charge and bank accounts information, tax records, immunizations records and bank account records in a waterproof, portable container.
* Cash or traveler's checks and change ($100 is recommended)
* Meeting plan – where to meet family in case of emergency. This should be a place outside of the home. A backup place should also be agreed upon.
* Evacuation plan – how to get out of the house in case of emergency. You should practice with family how to get out of each room of the house, preferably 2 ways out of each room. Also, evacuation plan for how to leave the city. This should include all possible routes. Consult local map and map out evacuation routes.
* Contact list. This should include a contact person outside of the state family members can contact in case of separation.
* Local maps with evacuation routes highlighted

CONTACT LIST / IMPORTANT NUMBERS:
Police: 911
Fire Department: 911
Poison Control: 1-800-222-1222
Doctor: fill in appropriate numbers
Dentist: "
Family contact: "
Father / Mother / Spouse’s work:Child’s school: "

7- Shelter and other essentials
* Sleeping bag or warm blanket for each person. Consider additional bedding if you live in a cold-weather climate.
* Paper and pencil
* Battery-powered or hand crank radio and a NOAA Weather Radio with tone alert and extra batteries for both
* Flashlight and extra batteries
* Whistle to signal for help
* Plastic sheeting and duct tape to shelter-in-place and rope OR pup tent / small tent
* Wrench or pliers to turn off utilities
* Prescription glasses

For Baby:

* Formula * Diaper Rash Ointment
* Diapers * Moist Towelettes
* Bottles * Medications
* Powdered Milk * Clothing items as described above

You may also want to include:

* Axe * Mirror (for signaling, shaving, etc.)
* Cell Phone * Ear plugs
* Fire Extinguisher

This was compiled with help from the following Handy References:
http://www.ready.gov/
www.fema.gov/areyouready? Call: 1-800-480-2520 for a free disaster preparedness manual
http://www.redcross.org/
http://www.providentliving.org/

Additionally:
Review/update your supplies regularly, especially if you have growing children. Check your kits 2x / year at General Conference Time. During this time rotate your water and food. (This is also a good time to check smoke / carbon monoxide detectors and rotate batteries). Also, rotate medical supplies as needed and clothing / diapers for growing children / babies. Always keep your car at least half full of gas in case of immediate evacuation. If you don’t have a car, arrange with a support network that can take you along in case of evacuation, and to check on you in case of emergency. It is wise to keep a written list of all items in your kit along with expiration dates so you can just check the list every 6 months. Store your items in an easy to carry container and easily accessible place. Keep first aid kits, water, food, and warm blankets in your car as well. IMPORTANT: Make sure your kit is easy to grab and carry-able. Ta Da!

[1] You may want to include a red/orange/lime green shirt or other clothing item, as these colors are easy for rescuers to spot.

[2] scan your documents (ID, passport, prescriptions, etc.) and email the images to yourself on a secure Internet server. This doesn't replace the photocopies you should carry with you, but it does give you a backup if all other copies are destroyed.