Fooshy Elevator Music

Back in college our phone had "technical difficulties".  Some may think "issues" would be a more fitting term.

This was in the days before widespread cell phone use.  Back then cell phones plugged into car cigarette lighters and had their own battery cases attached.  Those were corded, too.  A former boss of mine told me she used to work with a crisis hotline and had to carry around a cell phone the size of a large brick and hold it with 2 hands back in the day.  But I digress...

This was a land line.  It plugged into the wall and had a long, knotted, twisty cord that tethered you in the kitchen.  And it was beige.  For reasons unbeknownst to me, there was some kind of radio interference and somehow it picked up the local soft rock station.  So whenever we used the phone we would suddenly hear fooshy elevator music.  Alas, the person on the other end of the line couldn't hear it.  (I always thought it was some kind of conspiracy to up the station's listener count).

One day one of my best friends, Jessica, called me with wonderful news.  She was getting married!  She started giving details and was so exciting to tell me everything that I couldn't break in to tell her how hard I was trying not to laugh.  Not that getting engaged is funny.  No, I was very happy to hear that, of course, but there was this sappy love music  playing over the phone the entire time.  I have never had to bite my knuckles so hard to keep from breaking up.  If only she could have heard that lovey music and known how elegantly it accentuated her news.

A recipe for health. Sort of. And a few secrets...

Quite often when the sickies come to stay at our house, I make a big pot of soup.  We've been sick so often this season that if I had done that, we'd have eaten nothing but!  This time around it's strep throat, AGAIN, mixed most probably with the common cold.  Somehow I have escaped the strep and hope to stay that way.

Anyway.

Undeniably the worst part of soup for me is handling raw meat.  (A side effect that never went away with my first pregnancy).  Thankfully, today an epiphany came to me.  And so, I give you this home made recipe:

Momma K's Quick Soup
1 large onion
4 carrots
3 stalks celery
1/2+ c. rice (I used par boiled today, but any kind will do)
8 - 10 cups of your favorite broth (I used chicken)
2 bay leaves
1/2 tsp. thyme (I mashed mine in a mortar and pestle)
1 tsp. minced garlic
Garlic powder, to taste
Thick sliced luncheon meat.  I used Costco's roasted turkey lunch meat.  Thick and yummy.

I think that this is all I used.  I rarely use a recipe, I just throw things in as I go. 

First, slice up the onion into very small square-lets.  I suppose this would be called mincing them. 
Saute in oil.
Throw in the rice.
Cut carrots, throw in, cut celery (including leaves), throw in. 
Add broth, bay leaves, thyme, garlic, and sprinkle the top with garlic powder, to taste. 

When the rice is nearly done (check cooking times on the package.  Different types cook for different amounts of time) chop up as much lunch meat as you want and throw it in.

Voila!

I added lime juice to ours, and I served with lime wedges and tortilla chips.

Another soup secret, if it's too hot, just sprinkle with a frozen vegetable such as peas or corn.  This works well with chili, too.

And one more secret.  We wash out glass containers (such as jelly, etc) with screw on lids and use them to put leftovers, such as soup, in.  They are also handy when we make soup for others.  No worrying about having to return anything!

And, for desert we had fruit salad.  I just chopped up strawberries, bananas and apples, squeezed lime juice over it, and sprinkled with sugar.  Stir and serve.  (You can add any fruit you want, of course).

My wonderful vising teachers dropped off a sickness survival bag with all kinds of wonderful things, including Emergen-C.  So, hopefully we'll be all recovered in no time! 

Musings on One of the Best Days of the Year - April Fools!

So, today is one of the best holidays ever.  I have always loved April Fools' Day.

I can't describe the joy we had each year that Mom fell for the elastic-band-on-the-sprayer trick.  (She would just stand there screaming and doing a little quick step and getting sprayed on until someone finally quit laughing long enough to turn off the faucet).  She even admitted to me this morning how disappointed she was that she hadn't been sprayed yet today.  Maybe one of my siblings that live closer will fulfill her secret wish.

Anyway.

Thank heavens for me Family Fun always has fun ideas to keep my unsuspecting loved ones on their toes.  Like, for instance, this little gem:

  

"Easy to Grow - Fun to Eat"

Last year I made their faux-berry pie (shepherd's pie died with beat juice made to look like cream pie).  I also had drinks that looked deceptively refreshing that were actually cups of jello with straws.  

Alas.  I didn't photo-document it. 

This year I made up a fake parking ticket and stuck it on Mr. A.H.'s car.  (I also got the idea from Family Fun, here, but made up my own to look similar to our local tickets.  Not that I would know what they look like).  He totally didn't even notice.  But my sister did.  She and her husband thought they had been cited.  Until they noticed me filming them from the porch and snickering. 

"YOU!" 

Those were sis's exact words.  :-) 

And now.  Some friendly guidelines for enjoying this most merry of occassions revenge free.  (Hopefully!)

1.  Don't do anything mean.  Remember that golden rule!

2.  Don't lie.  In the words of Gram (roughly):
"If you've replaced the salt in the shaker with sugar, don't say, 'Would you like some salt?'  Say, 'Would you like some of this?'"  Jewels of wisdom.

3.  Pre-planning pays.  Don't be the one stuck running to the Dollar Store at midnight for fishing line and confetti.  Save those last minute trips for Christmas Eve.

4.  Don't break the law! Or else, you know. You're a law breaker. And we don't want that to spoil the fun.

5.  If all else fails, you can always hide patiently behind the door for an unsuspecting victim. 

So now if you'll excuse me, I'm totally going to go sign up for Chore Camp.

Doughnut Seeds look and taste strikingly similar to Honey Nut Cheerios.